"I'm sorry Becky, but its time to move on and sew."

Three things:
1) Um, current season of “Project Runway,” where have you been all my life? A) Heidi is at her HOTTEST. B) Tim is at his most fabulous. C) Gay (assuming) Asian named Olivier, nuff said. D) Nina Garcia totally brought her bitch to the party. Duh.
2) I just saw a commercial for TOP CHEF TEXAS (!!!!). Dying.
3) The Steps are finally back. They have been gone for a couple weeks. Welcome back!

Here’s the thing about the back and forth travel that children of divorce must participate in every week: It SUCKS for everyone involved. The first cut is always the deepest. And by cut, I mean day. And by deepest, I mean most difficult. When the Steps get here on Wednesday for their half of the week with us, it’s like having to get to know each other all over again. The kids have to deal with a different set of rules and a different family dynamic. And I have to deal with—well, being a step-parent.

Let me take this moment to state that these are two very good kids. They are smart, have goals and ambition, are very good and involved with their baby brother and have manners (but only outside the confines of the house).

However, let me give you a little nibble of how a typical first day goes:

IF DAD PICKS THEM UP: “Hi Dad, let me tell you about my week. Let me tell you about my day at school. I missed you dad. What are we going to do tonight?” And so on.

IF STEP-MOM PICK THEM UP: “HI” (Text text cell phone cell phone) “When’s dad getting home” (Text) “What are you cooking for dinner.” (Silence, text…oh yeah, and often a phone call to biomom—which is usually a long conversation—Like I’m INVISIBLE).

But look, I’m not complaining (ok, maybe a little). I understand how difficult it is to be in the step-shoes. I was a product of divorce and was usually a total diva drama child when I went back and forth from house to house. And honestly, I have very little advice for those in similar situations—other than BE CONSISTANT! The best thing to do is keep things at your house the same—so that even when the transitions are tough, at least they know what is expected of them under your hot tranny mess of a roof.

Oh and if you are not breastfeeding a small human, Xanax. For you, not the Steps—unless….

M